Imposter syndrome

As I loaded groceries into my cart and thought about what I have at home and what I actually need to buy, I heard two ladies chatting behind me.

They’re talking about how time flies—15 years since one of them wanted to write a poetry collection. They were coming towards me with the question about macaroni’s section, saying, “15 years”. I nod, getting the weight of her words.

They moved on in a search for macaroni, and she keeps talking about picking a publisher with her friend.

As I half-hear what they’re saying, I thought about how every year I make my wishlist, goals, scribbling down happily what I’ve achieved and putting the rest back for the next year. And how I keep writing some of the same goals. Goals I fear to accomplish because I’m afraid of others’ judgment. The goal of writing a blog. Because of that infamous imposter syndrome. I tell myself, there are so many wonderful blogs, so many people write beautifully, no topic is untouched. I know I’m not creative enough to come up with something new. I studied pharmacy, what does that have to do with writing? No chance. Why would anyone actually read what I write? Except for me and my husband, who has to.

Then I reconsider; this lady took 15 years. Must it take us another 15, 20, 30, 40… a whole lifetime to gather the courage to do something? To overcome that imposter syndrome?

Whose opinion are we afraid of? I’ll tell you—our own. We are our harshest critics, always feeling less talented, worthless…and the list is long. Yet, I’m sure, like me, you are supporting your friends and celebrate their victories! It makes me wonder—what kind of friends are we to ourselves? If we treated our friends like we treat ourselves, we’d be alone in the world. Right?

As for the imposter syndrome, does it apply if we’re beginners? No! We are just beginners, and it’s okay not to know. It’s okay to ask, make mistakes, mess up, and correct. We build ourselves throughout life, and mistakes are part of that journey.

So, regardless of the modest readership this blog may currently have, consider this blog the BiGGEST SIGN from the universe to pursue your dream! Launch your vision! Start that business! Send that message! Let’s not perpetuate the same dream we daydream about for 2024, let’s take action right now!

Would be wonderful if you can share your progress because here is another friend ready to cheer for you! Go for it!

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Imposter syndrome

Dok ubacujem namirinice u korpu i razmisljam sta imam kod kuce a sta mi zapravo treba, cujem iza sebe dve gospodje kako razgovaraju.

Govore kako godine lete i kako ne mogu da veruju da je proslo toliko. Da je proslo 15 godina od kako je htela da napise zbirku pesama. Upravo ta dama me i pita gde se nalaze makaroni. I kaze meni: “15 godina”. Klimam glavom kao da znam sta misli. 

Odlaze u potragu za makaronima i nastavlja svojoj  prijateljici da prica kako bira izdavaca. 

I tako dok napola cujem sta govore, razmisljam kako svake godine pravim svoj spisak zelja,  ciljeve, skrabam presrecna sta sam ispunila a ostatak vracam opet za sledecu godinu. I kako vecito stavljam neke iste ciljeve.  Ciljeve za koje se plasim da uradim jer strahujem od osuda drugih. Cilj da pisem blog. Jer taj cuveni imposter sindrom. Kazem ja sebi, pa ima toliko divnih blogova, toliko ljudi predivno pisu, nema teme koja nije dotaknuta. Znam da nisam dovoljno kreativna da bih ja sada uzela i napisala nesto novo. Zavrsila sam farmaciju, kakve to veze ima sa pisanjem. Pa nema sanse. Zasto bi bilo ko zapravo i citao ovo sto ja pisem? Sem mene i mog muza koji mora. 

Onda opet razmisljam, ovoj gospodji je trebalo 15 godina. Zar treba da nam prodje jos 15,20,30,40.. ceo zivot dok skupimo hrabrosti da nesto uradimo? Dok skupimo hrabrosti da pobedimo taj imposter sindrom?

Jer cijeg misljenja se mi plasimo? Recicu vam- sopstvenog. Mi smo sebi uvek najgori, najmanje talentovani, najmanje znamo…a sigurna sam da vi, bas kao i ja, bodrite svoje prijatelje i velicate ih kada krenu u nove pobede!! Pa kakvi smo onda mi to prijatelji sebi? Da se ophodimo prema nasim prijateljima kao prema sebi, ostali bi sami na svetu. Zar ne? 

Jos jedna stvar, zapitajte se da li zapravo vazi imposter sindrom ako smo pocetnici? Mi smo samo pocetnici, u redu je ne znati. Dakle, recite ne imposter sindromu! Recite sebi da je u redu pitati, gresiti, brljati i prepravljati. Gradimo sebe ceo zivot. A kako najbolje to radimo-kroz greske. 

Zato koliko god malo vas da cita trenutno ovaj blog, neka bas ovo bude OGROMAN ZNAK od univerzuma da trebate da uradite to sto zelite! Pokrenite svoju viziju! Zapocnite taj biznis! Posaljite tu poruku! Ajde da ne prebacujemo opet isti san o kojem mastamo za 2024, nego da ucinimo nesto bas sada!  

I javite mi sta se desava, jer ovde vas ceka jos jedan prijatelj koji ce navijati jako za vas! Samo napred!